It's all about the BSD Baybee..

It's all about the power to serve, the bandwidth to burn, the 99.9% cpu idle time on an OC3 lazily hosting a couple insignificant services. As long as I could remember I always wanted a server of sorts. An monarchy of power yet standing with open arms to those in need. I can remember as far back as when I first realize there was an ability for two computers to talk to each other. Then MORE!

I remember sitting infront of my 8086 Portable (uhh. no) PC with it's built in monochrome monitor and flip down keyboard dialing up what used to be BBS's spending far to many hours trying to figure out how they did it and how I could do it to. I even remember managing across some BBS hosting software, spending many hours tweaking it to my exact configration only to realize my house didn't have a T1 laid to it. The concept of tearing apart that big green box down the street back about 20' in the woods first came to me then. Finding a digi-board to accept multiple dial ins to my single server was the only thing that consumed me at the time.

Later down the line I found the internet. It single handedly grabbed my attention with an iron fist leaving old architecture and ideas of a BBS behind. Chat servers, millions of people, bugs, flaws, The power to serve. At that point in time I figured the only way to serve was to figure out how to run an establishment that was already in place. I never achieved such a goal. But I did start learning how to be a happily served customer. . It wasn't quite satisfying enough..

A few years later and a couple customers later the reality of getting my own server to play with came true. Virtualy unlimited bandwidth, Power to serve the masses. Power to serve myself. Power to control. I have a server.

It's funny how I look back and can easily see how the rails of my pc education were allways based on serving and power which demanded a certain level of education previously learned but not thought about. It'd almost make it seem like finaly having a server on the internet would be the pinicle of my dreams. The destination. Now theres me, the server, and the rest of the internet.

It's not so great. Yeah. you heard me. It's not so great. Isn't that how eveything goes? You strive to attain or achieve and once your there you realize it was just a door. It's not a prize. Not even realy a complete destination. Just a door. A door to stand in, look through and decide whats next.

Anyway. I was just remenissing about the past n' thought about all that. figured I'd post it. It's crazy how things have evolved right infront of me. If things were like they were in teh past the cost of a server and everything else would be so astronomicly bound I still wouldn't have one. heh. It's crazy how everything is an accomplishment but the base of it is that another door was opened. I'd even go so far as to guess thats what everyones relationship with pc's has been wetehr they started out on em super young (I had my own PC from age 9, using my dads for simple games and whatnot between 7 and 8) or you've just now accepted em into your life. It's a perpetual conflict between accomplishments and determining the next path.

I love babbling in the stupor of the morning. I don't wake up for a few hours after I get up. heh. *yawns* time for some breakfast.